Stories from real life #3 – The irregular earner

You know the first thing you asked me – if £250 extra expense would be stressful?
The answer is it would be chaos. It would be a huge thing. It’s not a lot of money per se. I have paid more than that for sunglasses in the past, but now it’s different.

I have worked as a counsellor and a PA. I opened my own little business, but that didn’t work out. Now I am freelancing as a PA – which is no money at all. I never have money; I am always chasing my tail. I get money, then I return it to bank, or to other people, whoever!

The excitement of getting paid literally lasts one day, because the next morning I am paying all my bills. I didn’t think I would ever get depressed about my finances this way. I used to go to the theatre, exhibitions, rock concerts, etc. I used to do it every week, now maybe twice a year. I’m constantly stressed and £250 would be a big deal.

Maybe what I hate most is people who don’t know what they are talking about when I go into the bank on the high street. If you ask them for help sorting stuff out, they are useless. It drives me mad. That’s why I try and do everything online.

I use the banking apps for my accounts and other online services for currency exchanges and stuff. There are so many new services coming out now online, and I try to get to know them as much as I can.

Sometimes really awful unexpected things can happen. I had a family reunion abroad, and the day before I left, a traffic camera snapped me driving in junction box. I was away, so of course no one replied, and the fine went up to £200. I argued and argued – showed them scans of my boarding passes and everything, and eventually got them to compromise. But these are the sort of things that can really throw you into chaos.

If there were a way to feel just that little bit safer, without going into more debt, I would sign up for it tonight. It’s not like I’m the only one like this, many of my friends live the same way.

Last week my mom sent me £100. Where I come from, parents often help their kids out much later, but still. Just want to be happy. My old boss was a millionaire, but when he died no one picked up his ashes. I guess that puts things in perspective, doesn’t it?


Also published on Medium.